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The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) has levied a record fine against Santa Claus for violating children's privacy, writes Jeff Jarvis in a satire for the Huffington Post. Claus reportedly maintains a database of naughtiness and niceness--tied to such personally identifiable information as children's names, addresses and ages, solicited online and shared with third parties in some cases. The FTC isn't alone in its action, Jarvis writes. Canadian Privacy Commissioner Jennifer Stoddart is assembling a coalition of those opposed to Claus's practices, while European regulators are calling for a children's right to be forgotten and are questioning Claus's use of Google's Street View for his operations. "What's the worst they can do to me?" asked Claus, "Cookie me?" Editor's note: In all seriousness, Jarvis will deliver a keynote at the IAPP's Global Privacy Summit in March.
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